Right now....
I seriously have realized so much in one summer. I truly am extremely happy with the way my life is right at this moment. Mariah and I had a HUGE conversation about relationship stuff on the way home tonight from brits aunts house. We really have deep conversations about the most random things. I think the one thing that made me think about my life was a special little text from a special someone that had a few a couple nights ago. It read, "I love my life, don't you love yours?" I of course laughed at first, but then quickly realized that it wasn't that funny. It was such a deep question. I really thought about that for the longest time. Now that I have thought it through, I realize that my life is going on a great path right now. My schooling is going the exact path I wanted it to go down, I love my family and being with them, I have a flippin job, which I am greatful for, and I'm happily single for the moment.lol I'm just waiting for right one to come knocking on my door one of these days. I just don't want to mess up with getting into another bad relationship again. I am changing my ways....and is taking it all slow....the way it should be done. Getting to know the guy before you get into any relationship mumbo gumbo...
Tomorrow is going to be a FULL day of work at the farm. We start chopping early because of the rainy day we had and the rainy days to come...:( But I don't mind if I'm on a john deere the whole day. I would rather drive a tractor, then a handful of other things.
I also have a ton of things I would like to get done, calling for certain appt like my tattoo checkup to see if it needs any touchups, spending time with my bro and sis before school, and my mom/daughter time together. I also still need to pack up all my EC things. Even though I'm only staying for a semester.....I still have tons of things to bring.
I seriously can't believe that my Stats professor is already sending out emails....yuck not looking forward to homework and tests....but excited to see my friends and have a good time!!!
K
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
yeah yeah yeah
so anywho...
im just so happy/sad/baffled/determined.....with my life right now. Seriously, I really am just straight out boggled. My life these days has been a complete 360 from the past 4 yrs of my life. I really am enjoying my life a whole lot more now then before. I appreciate more things in life, and finally get to worry about myself and myself only for once. the one thing that is for sure a positive in my life right now is that im meeting SO many new ppl. I truely enjoy that.
today: Worked at the farm about the whole day. Got done and as i was driving up my driveway....something hits my right side of my car hard. i thought that is was a rabbit, but it was my dog copper. I was so scared that he for sure was a goner....but he shook it off like it was no big deal. haha and i had no dents on my car!! so I was so happy!
My mom, sis and I went to mtown to get something to eat and to get groceries. We needed them badly. As we were coming home....a raccoon came running out and we hit it. I'm pretty sure that it was a goner. I was pretty sad about it. but my night turned alot better after my lovely conversation with a person I really wanted to talk to. HAHA well lets just say that I got the butterflies in my stomach from it. :) But i cant get too happy just in case nothing works out. so keep the fingers crossed and knock on wood!
Mariah, Evan, and I watched I Love You Man.....boy that sure was funny!!!! i sure liked it!!! til another night! gnite!
K
im just so happy/sad/baffled/determined.....with my life right now. Seriously, I really am just straight out boggled. My life these days has been a complete 360 from the past 4 yrs of my life. I really am enjoying my life a whole lot more now then before. I appreciate more things in life, and finally get to worry about myself and myself only for once. the one thing that is for sure a positive in my life right now is that im meeting SO many new ppl. I truely enjoy that.
today: Worked at the farm about the whole day. Got done and as i was driving up my driveway....something hits my right side of my car hard. i thought that is was a rabbit, but it was my dog copper. I was so scared that he for sure was a goner....but he shook it off like it was no big deal. haha and i had no dents on my car!! so I was so happy!
My mom, sis and I went to mtown to get something to eat and to get groceries. We needed them badly. As we were coming home....a raccoon came running out and we hit it. I'm pretty sure that it was a goner. I was pretty sad about it. but my night turned alot better after my lovely conversation with a person I really wanted to talk to. HAHA well lets just say that I got the butterflies in my stomach from it. :) But i cant get too happy just in case nothing works out. so keep the fingers crossed and knock on wood!
Mariah, Evan, and I watched I Love You Man.....boy that sure was funny!!!! i sure liked it!!! til another night! gnite!
K
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
been busy
well for starters...
im too tired to capitalize my words and do correct punctuationss...but anywho. i have been very busy with life....keeping up with friends, work, school stuff for nursing, and many other crazy things that go on in my life. these days i really dont like goin on fb....because once ur on ur on for good....and its a complete waste of time most of the time. I have sooooooo many things that i could do for the weekend....there are way too many plans for me to figure out which one i do or not. i should just make a list of thinks that i would like to do for fun and the things that i need to do for like chores and such. i already heard that we will be mowing tomorrow and that there is a possiblilty that we might as a family go to lake wazee which is where i was today. I know for next time that i will have to bring some goggles and some more scuba gear. boy that water can look pretty eerie when all murky..... i would say more but im falling asleep!!!
K
im too tired to capitalize my words and do correct punctuationss...but anywho. i have been very busy with life....keeping up with friends, work, school stuff for nursing, and many other crazy things that go on in my life. these days i really dont like goin on fb....because once ur on ur on for good....and its a complete waste of time most of the time. I have sooooooo many things that i could do for the weekend....there are way too many plans for me to figure out which one i do or not. i should just make a list of thinks that i would like to do for fun and the things that i need to do for like chores and such. i already heard that we will be mowing tomorrow and that there is a possiblilty that we might as a family go to lake wazee which is where i was today. I know for next time that i will have to bring some goggles and some more scuba gear. boy that water can look pretty eerie when all murky..... i would say more but im falling asleep!!!
K
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Sundays suck...:(
IM JUST FUCKING PISSED!!!!!
First off I have been trying (hence the word trying) to start and date and such....yeah yeah...blah blah. I went on this date..with a guy that I thought at first would be just another guy I would go on a date with and it would be boring. He was different. I really enjoyed his company and all that. So I really wanted to get to know him more. He pretty much was the nicest guy I have ever met. Seriously, he was a genuine guy that treated me like a princess. A week had gone by of seeing each other like every night and everything was great. I mean I hadn't been treated like a princess by a guy in what? FOREVER!!! I pretty much had to go through the shittiest relationship to figure out what is good in life...and then what do I go and do....I say I can't do this. I fuck everything that is good up...because why...well I can't handle someone telling me constantly that I'm beautiful and that I'm gorgous....and say sorry constantly for the littlest things. Because I'm not used to that...and that I'm FUCKED UP!! I'm just so angry right now about everything. How can someone so close to u at one point go and hurt you when you do everything in your power to make them happy. I guess when he hurt me....he totally fucked me up..seriously. I may look like it doesn't affect me...I put a good front that's for sure. But its there in me that I know the way I truely feel.
Tonight was the Vesper Firemens picnic. I was there, met up with some friends, talked with ppl i knew, and saw the nice guy there also. It was so hard to be there and see him...plus I know that he was getting wasted. He made everything uncomfortable...and I still want to be friends. Him and his friend were way gone....almost got into a fight...he may have gotten hurt and wanted to drive home. Luckily he had a good friend that would drive to two of them home. I was worried.
A part of me thinks that I have fucked it up breaking things off with him and the other part tells me that I'm not ready to be in anything serious right now. I truely don't know what the fuck I want. I just can't be happy, and that's just sad.
K
First off I have been trying (hence the word trying) to start and date and such....yeah yeah...blah blah. I went on this date..with a guy that I thought at first would be just another guy I would go on a date with and it would be boring. He was different. I really enjoyed his company and all that. So I really wanted to get to know him more. He pretty much was the nicest guy I have ever met. Seriously, he was a genuine guy that treated me like a princess. A week had gone by of seeing each other like every night and everything was great. I mean I hadn't been treated like a princess by a guy in what? FOREVER!!! I pretty much had to go through the shittiest relationship to figure out what is good in life...and then what do I go and do....I say I can't do this. I fuck everything that is good up...because why...well I can't handle someone telling me constantly that I'm beautiful and that I'm gorgous....and say sorry constantly for the littlest things. Because I'm not used to that...and that I'm FUCKED UP!! I'm just so angry right now about everything. How can someone so close to u at one point go and hurt you when you do everything in your power to make them happy. I guess when he hurt me....he totally fucked me up..seriously. I may look like it doesn't affect me...I put a good front that's for sure. But its there in me that I know the way I truely feel.
Tonight was the Vesper Firemens picnic. I was there, met up with some friends, talked with ppl i knew, and saw the nice guy there also. It was so hard to be there and see him...plus I know that he was getting wasted. He made everything uncomfortable...and I still want to be friends. Him and his friend were way gone....almost got into a fight...he may have gotten hurt and wanted to drive home. Luckily he had a good friend that would drive to two of them home. I was worried.
A part of me thinks that I have fucked it up breaking things off with him and the other part tells me that I'm not ready to be in anything serious right now. I truely don't know what the fuck I want. I just can't be happy, and that's just sad.
K
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Tattoo time and much more...
First off...
I would like to say that I love my tattoo. It is everything I thought it would be and more. The only bad thing is is that it hurt like a son of a nutcracker when I got it done. It took over 3 hrs to get the finished product. Lets just say it hurt so bad, and now it itches like a friggin skeeder bite and is startin to peel. The greatest thing also was that my mom was waiting for her first tattoo after mine was finished. We seriously were at the parlor for a good 9 hours. YUCK!
This tat doesnt make things easy to do either. Farming is a choir with a tattooed foot. The artists said that I shouldnt where anything on my foot for a good week or so. But its hard not to with me working on a farm. 2nd crop starts tomorrow by the way.
The fourth of july was an ok day. Went to heathers for food. Then found the zawislan family, whom are all wonderful people, and played a little bingo. Of course i didnt win. But I did make plans to go kayakin with Ben, Angel, and Jeremy. What do they do? they ditch at the last minute....it sure felt like a set up....But I cant complain at all....kayaking and the great company was a blast. Now that really made me want a kayak my self.
I also had a date Mon. I'm not goin into any details. It was a dinner and a movie...Public Enemies....real good by the way. I havent been on a real date in forever. But im still not sure if Im fully ready for dating yet........hummmmm that sure takes some time to think thats for sure.
Like I said 2nd crop is on this week...so pretty much good night!!!
K
I would like to say that I love my tattoo. It is everything I thought it would be and more. The only bad thing is is that it hurt like a son of a nutcracker when I got it done. It took over 3 hrs to get the finished product. Lets just say it hurt so bad, and now it itches like a friggin skeeder bite and is startin to peel. The greatest thing also was that my mom was waiting for her first tattoo after mine was finished. We seriously were at the parlor for a good 9 hours. YUCK!
This tat doesnt make things easy to do either. Farming is a choir with a tattooed foot. The artists said that I shouldnt where anything on my foot for a good week or so. But its hard not to with me working on a farm. 2nd crop starts tomorrow by the way.
The fourth of july was an ok day. Went to heathers for food. Then found the zawislan family, whom are all wonderful people, and played a little bingo. Of course i didnt win. But I did make plans to go kayakin with Ben, Angel, and Jeremy. What do they do? they ditch at the last minute....it sure felt like a set up....But I cant complain at all....kayaking and the great company was a blast. Now that really made me want a kayak my self.
I also had a date Mon. I'm not goin into any details. It was a dinner and a movie...Public Enemies....real good by the way. I havent been on a real date in forever. But im still not sure if Im fully ready for dating yet........hummmmm that sure takes some time to think thats for sure.
Like I said 2nd crop is on this week...so pretty much good night!!!
K
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
blog it up
So anywho...
Im back from a long weekendish time at Countryfest...which was funski. I met montgomery gentry and the whole 9 yards. Took tons of pics and dressed crazy for every show. Which wasnt that crazy since every girl that was there pretty much wore the same too..big or small..lol. the thing that really got me was all the ppl that were dying when i was gone...nothing ever happens when im home, but as soon as im gone....Farrah Fawcett, the King of Pop, and Billy Mayes all die.....they will be sadly missed by all. Oxyclean, the old Charlies Angels, and Thriller will never be the same again....
All I'm thinking about right now is my grandma...its her birthday tomorrow so we are all goin to her mass dedicated to her in the morning. I really miss her and I think about her at the most random times.. It has been 2 months since she passed away...and it still feels like yesterday. I just looked at the clock...just now...so Happy bday gma....i miss u and love u! She would be 88 years old today. wow how time flies....
There is another person that is on my mind too, but I dont want to bring the name up. I really dont know who reads this and little do i know if that person will read this in the future...so its best kept to myself. I am so confused about this person too. They dont give answers when u ask questions. I think its to make me go crazy, which seems to be working.
I'm excited to get my tat done on thurs...with my mom and maybe my aunt betty. So I cant wait...other then that I need to send in a payment on a parking ticket from school which is rediculous and I have to send in all my nursing papers tom...so im all done with that. So much to do in so little time to do it.
Time to hit the hay...
K
Im back from a long weekendish time at Countryfest...which was funski. I met montgomery gentry and the whole 9 yards. Took tons of pics and dressed crazy for every show. Which wasnt that crazy since every girl that was there pretty much wore the same too..big or small..lol. the thing that really got me was all the ppl that were dying when i was gone...nothing ever happens when im home, but as soon as im gone....Farrah Fawcett, the King of Pop, and Billy Mayes all die.....they will be sadly missed by all. Oxyclean, the old Charlies Angels, and Thriller will never be the same again....
All I'm thinking about right now is my grandma...its her birthday tomorrow so we are all goin to her mass dedicated to her in the morning. I really miss her and I think about her at the most random times.. It has been 2 months since she passed away...and it still feels like yesterday. I just looked at the clock...just now...so Happy bday gma....i miss u and love u! She would be 88 years old today. wow how time flies....
There is another person that is on my mind too, but I dont want to bring the name up. I really dont know who reads this and little do i know if that person will read this in the future...so its best kept to myself. I am so confused about this person too. They dont give answers when u ask questions. I think its to make me go crazy, which seems to be working.
I'm excited to get my tat done on thurs...with my mom and maybe my aunt betty. So I cant wait...other then that I need to send in a payment on a parking ticket from school which is rediculous and I have to send in all my nursing papers tom...so im all done with that. So much to do in so little time to do it.
Time to hit the hay...
K
Sunday, June 21, 2009
HAVING THE BEST WEEKEND EVER!!
So first off...
Friday was full of working at the farm and milking. Yeah, but the good thing was that I started early to get done early because I made plans with Mariah and Team Jordan (Jordan Weiler and Jordan Freund) to go to Applebees and to the movie Year One. The movie sucked a hard one. It really was bad. Be we all seemed to have a good time. After the movie we decided to head to Auburndale and hit up Shabangers. It was fun until we had to leave. We ended up coming back to my house and "tried" to work my TV in my basement....didn 't figure it out. haha.
Saturday I got up and hand washed my car and my mom's car. I also went to the softball tourney that was going on this whole weekend. It was such a nice day out. I even got a nice little sunburn on my right foot and my back. I got back from the games and I saw the letter that I have been waiting for for the longest time. And it was there, lying on the countertop. Nobody was home, so I took it and I contemplated if I wanted to open it at the table. I finally decided to open it. There were a couple of papers in the envelope, so I was hoping that that was a good thing. I opened the papers halfway, and I saw the word CONGRADULATIONS!!! What did I do??? I bawled...like a little baby. I was so happy. I ran around the house screaming all by myself, since everybody was at church at the time. I sent out a huge group text to almost everyone on my phone about it. I called Mariah first, then my cuz Tiff. I waited patiently until church was over to call my family. I seriously was on cloud 9. I went over to Heather's house, went with her, JJ,Sojka, and Terry to the Drive-In. After that Heather and I and her dad went to the Vogel's grad party. We left after an hour. That is when I went over to Mariah's house where Mike F., Me and Mariah watched a movie. I got a call at 12:30 from Heather saying we should come out to Vogel's again. We went there and I only wanted to stay for an hour or so....but I was there until 3. What an interesting night. lol
Sunday: I'm tired, but I did go to church....and now I'm laying around. I also went to the tourney today.
Friday was full of working at the farm and milking. Yeah, but the good thing was that I started early to get done early because I made plans with Mariah and Team Jordan (Jordan Weiler and Jordan Freund) to go to Applebees and to the movie Year One. The movie sucked a hard one. It really was bad. Be we all seemed to have a good time. After the movie we decided to head to Auburndale and hit up Shabangers. It was fun until we had to leave. We ended up coming back to my house and "tried" to work my TV in my basement....didn 't figure it out. haha.
Saturday I got up and hand washed my car and my mom's car. I also went to the softball tourney that was going on this whole weekend. It was such a nice day out. I even got a nice little sunburn on my right foot and my back. I got back from the games and I saw the letter that I have been waiting for for the longest time. And it was there, lying on the countertop. Nobody was home, so I took it and I contemplated if I wanted to open it at the table. I finally decided to open it. There were a couple of papers in the envelope, so I was hoping that that was a good thing. I opened the papers halfway, and I saw the word CONGRADULATIONS!!! What did I do??? I bawled...like a little baby. I was so happy. I ran around the house screaming all by myself, since everybody was at church at the time. I sent out a huge group text to almost everyone on my phone about it. I called Mariah first, then my cuz Tiff. I waited patiently until church was over to call my family. I seriously was on cloud 9. I went over to Heather's house, went with her, JJ,Sojka, and Terry to the Drive-In. After that Heather and I and her dad went to the Vogel's grad party. We left after an hour. That is when I went over to Mariah's house where Mike F., Me and Mariah watched a movie. I got a call at 12:30 from Heather saying we should come out to Vogel's again. We went there and I only wanted to stay for an hour or so....but I was there until 3. What an interesting night. lol
Sunday: I'm tired, but I did go to church....and now I'm laying around. I also went to the tourney today.
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